Last few months

As you already know I haven’t posted in a long time, but life has a funny way of rearing it’s head and interfering in what we want to do.

What should have been my husbands 2nd anniversary of being cancer free we got the news we had been fearing, the cancer was back but this time in throat, much frustration, worry and testing later they told us it was in his voice box and they would have to remove it.

Once they said this everything seemed to move at almost blurring speeds, right up until the day of his surgery.  Then it felt like it slowed to a snails pace, he was in the hospital for 14 days, over the Christmas holidays and let me tell you that was the longest two weeks of my life.

He was in the hospital in Seattle, and I was stuck at home three hours away, not having a car meant I couldn’t even go see him.  I called daily but he was unable to speak and it felt like I was pulling teeth to get any sort of answers from most of the staff, one of the doctors didn’t even know he was to call me.

He finally made it home, but it didn’t relieve my fears as now I had to learn to take care of him in ways I never dreamed.  Between caring for his lary tube (a small tube inserted into his throat that he breaths through), suctioning it, making sure his humidifier is set up and full, for a few weeks taking care of the feeding tube, learning to coordinate between the sea of doctors and suppliers, and still deal with the day to day stuff of running the house and the animals.  At times I really felt like I was going to lose my mind (yes, I do actually still have one to lose lol).

Add to all of this, when they did the PET scan before the surgery they also found a spot on his lung.  Originally we were scheduled to go in and have it checked in January, but he wasn’t up to dealing with it so it was pushed back for later.

Jump forward to now; he has agreed to have the spot on his lung checked.  At this time the CT and PET scans are all over 6 months old so the doctor want new ones, which is a headache in and of itself as he is allergic to the dye used for contrast CT, so in scheduling all of this I also have to make sure they order the medications he needs before hand.  I have doctors trying to juggle their schedules as to when this can be done, I have him getting upset and pharmacies that can’t seem to fax the right refill information to the doctors.

As we prepare for the appointment with the Cancer Care Alliance to find out what is going on with his lungs I feel like the craziness is starting all over, and I can only hope I have the strength to get through it.

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